The Minimalist Educator Podcast
A podcast about paring down to focus on the purpose and priorities in our roles.
The Minimalist Educator Podcast
Episode 069: Leading with Love: Putting People First in Education with Laurie Namey
Laurie Namey shares how prioritizing people first in educational leadership leads to transformative school cultures and student achievement. Her leadership philosophy centers on a minimalist principle, proving that when people are valued first, everything else falls into place.
• Prioritize people by day, paperwork by night
• The physical environment communicates value – students deserve clean, well-maintained spaces
• Create non-negotiable routines that center on student interactions
• Personalized communication matters – handwritten notes have profound impact
• Allow space for vulnerability in leadership when facing challenges
• In crisis moments, focus solely on what's best for students
• Core values and clear purpose help maintain balance during difficult situations
• Hard work, consistent routines, and putting people first are foundation for success
Remember what's at the heart of our work – taking care of children first, everything else second.
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Welcome to the Minimalist Educator Podcast, a podcast about paring down to refocus on the purpose and priorities in our roles with co-hosts and co-authors of the Minimalist Teacher Book, Tammy Musialski-Borneman and Christine Arnold.
Speaker 2:In today's episode we speak with Laurie Namy. Her Pair Down Pointer tells us to focus on people by day and paperwork by night. Dr Laurie Namy proudly serves as the Director of Middle School's Howard County Public School System and is the former principal of a community middle school in Jumper, maryland. She also served half of county public schools as the Supervisor of Equity and Cultural Proficiency. Namy also is an instructor of Goucher College in Baltimore. Laurie is a member of the ASCD Emerging Leader Class of 2014. She has presented on multiple educational topics on the state and national levels. She completed her doctoral program in Urban Education Leadership at Morgan State University and State University.
Speaker 3:Hello everyone and welcome to today's episode of the Minimalist Educator Podcast. Today, christine and I are talking with Lori Namey from the Baltimore area, who is what I would consider a powerhouse school leader, and so we are going to chat today about primarily leading with love, but of course, we're going to see where our conversation goes. Welcome to the show, lori.
Speaker 4:Thank you so much, so glad to be here.
Speaker 3:How is it going for you today?
Speaker 4:It's great, it's snow day and on the East Coast here we didn't get much snow, but enough to cancel school in the surrounding areas and surrounding counties. So I'm enjoying the snow day but, like I just shared, it is February and I still have my Christmas tree up, so that's going to be the task after our conversation today.
Speaker 3:All good, all good. How are you today?
Speaker 2:Christine, I'm fantastic. How are you, tammy, doing pretty well.
Speaker 3:I'm fantastic. How are you, tammy, doing? Pretty well. I'm happy to be talking with another amazing educational leader such as Laurie. Laurie and I have known each other for like 10 and 11 years now almost both the Leaders, same class and I feel like we've found each other in different places, where we would often see each other at conferences and hang out there and I've really learned to. I loved watching your posts when you were a principal and working with your students and with a deep focus on that connection to students as people and leading with love. So can you kind of, like you know, give us a little bit of your backstory, lori, on how you kind of knew that that was the direction you had to go when working with students?
Speaker 4:Sure. So this is my 25th year as an educator. I can't believe I'm saying that out loud. So this is my 25th year as an educator? I can't believe I'm saying that out loud. And from the beginning I think of time I knew I wanted to help others and to teach and eventually to lead, and it was because of the love that I received, I believe, from educators and family members that really modeled that you should always put people at the forefront of everything that you do.
Speaker 4:So in my journey I've been a teacher, a behavior coach, an assistant principal.
Speaker 4:I was supervisor of equity and cultural proficiency for my previous school system for many years and then I had the amazing opportunity to become the transformational principal at Magnolia Middle School, right outside of Baltimore, maryland, and that has been where I spent the last five and a half years of my career, until September of this year when I ventured to a leadership, a system leadership role in Howard County, maryland, on the other side of Baltimore.
Speaker 4:So I took the leap of faith this late in my career, but it's been an amazing journey and I know that being, if I'm experiencing any kind of success, which I think I am a couple months in, as director of middle schools for Howard County. Really, everything that I'm taking with me has come from the work that I've done as a school leader with me has come from the work that I've done as a school leader and so that really grounds me every day and what I hope with my 20 principals that I get to serve and watch lead that they'll receive love and support from me in a way that transfers for them, supporting their staffs and their children with love too.
Speaker 2:That's awesome. What a great career to have experienced. I know this might seem like an obvious question, but why do you think relationships are so important when we're talking about education? Why isn't it student achievement? Why isn't it data results? Why isn't it innovation and new initiatives? Why is it the relationships that are at the core of everything?
Speaker 4:I think you said that it's an easy question. I think that's what you said, but I don't think that is an easy question.
Speaker 2:Just in the context of this group. It might be a bit obvious, but you know.
Speaker 4:No, I truly feel that people do more when they feel supported and they feel loved and they feel recognized for who they are as human beings and that has been my experience could convince me otherwise that people, when they feel that you're in the work with them, when they feel that you see the best in them, they will rise to the occasion and that eventually leads to student achievement, to positive culture and climate, to powerful connections, lifelong connections with families and the students that we get to serve. So that's really just how I've approached things. It's funny, you know, thinking about being here today on the Minimalist Educator.
Speaker 4:I am the queen of do too much and going overboard. So it's one of, actually one of my friends and colleagues who I shared with this morning that I was doing this podcast and he said really, you're, how do you? I mean really, I can't even pronounce minimalist. I don't think it's a word that I use in my capillary, I'm succinct or anything like. That is not part of the frame. But when you think about it, even as as much as I put a lot of energy and a lot of, I guess, fanfare around the work that we do as school leaders, it is really that simple. It is. The minimalist thing is that people have to come first in what we do and everything else really falls into place.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and it's funny, right to place. Yeah, and it's funny right Like that's why we wanted you to be on the show is because you really do still in this current role and did with your students, when you're working directly with them, you do have a singular focus and that is them right Like you're, you're leading with your whole heart and everybody knows that. It's easy to see, and I wish I had visited your school when you're still there because I loved seeing, like all the things. Like you say you, you know you you do all the things for people, but it really is because of this one reason that you just love them so much. And so what are some of the things that you would do and still continue to do in this role? But you might maybe differentiate between student and like colleague and staff members, but what are some of the things that you do that really show people how much you do care for them and how you're investing in the relationship with people?
Speaker 4:Yeah, yeah, so, um, I think someone once said you should prioritize people by day, paperwork by night, and so my philosophy has always been really just to keep people at the center, but also making sure that I was loving out loud. I never wanted to let myself be outworked. I never would ask somebody to do something that I couldn't do myself. I wanted people to understand that I was in the work alongside of them, and that has, I think, been a transparent way I've led. I also think that you could tell what a school values within the first five minutes of walking through the door, and so we paid a lot of attention, especially when I first got there and it continues and continues now while I'm not there is to really pay attention to the physical plan of the building. That communicates love, too, and value. So if our building is clean, if there's pictures of people our most valuable possession, having people be our prized possession then they're the ones that we should see first. So I had a dynamic they're still there an amazing custodial team who had so much pride in our building and they worked so hard to make sure that our physical space was perfect for our kids each and every day, and it's a 40-year-old building, but more than that, almost a 50 year old building, but it's still. It's still shined every day, and that's because our kids deserved it and our staff deserved it as well. The other thing that I would do is I put structures in place that really prioritize people before anything else. 750 kids would walk through our doors every morning. I only would allow one door to be open so that they would all have to pass me, and I would be able to greet every single child every morning. That was a non-negotiable for me. The other thing that was a non-negotiable for me was that I didn't schedule any like meetings unless there was an urgent matter. Before 9 am, my priority was to be in every single classroom every single day, and if you don't schedule that out or prioritize a specific time for it, it doesn't happen, and so that was really important for me too.
Speaker 4:And then, something that I've learned, I think, from a mentor of mine, our former superintendent. I'll call her name. Her name is Barbara Canavan. One of the things that she always did was make the personal phone call, write the personal note not the email, you know the note and just to give people the opportunity to feel recognized, to feel that human connection. I always still do that, no matter how labor intensive it is.
Speaker 4:I had a staff of 100 and every teacher appreciation week I would write all 100 of them a personalized note. That never went away. And now, you know, in my new role I serve 66 principals and assistant principals and for the holiday season I wrote every single one of them a card, personalized to them, about them and what I've learned in a very short amount of time. So for some, you know, I didn't get to write maybe as much as I would want it to, because I was just getting there and really just trying to get to know everybody.
Speaker 4:But just the feedback that I got from that was powerful to me. It's just part of the work and it's part of who I am and it's what I'm carrying with me from Barbara and many other leaders that I've gotten a chance to work with. But I didn't realize the impact. People back in Hartford County they were used to me, they knew that that was coming, but for this new group of individuals that I get to lead alongside with, there was a lot of like wow, you know. But hopefully, you know, they learn from that experience, that moment too and they're going to pass that on to their staffs and to their kids. So little things make a huge difference, and my grandfather always used to say the greatest gift you could give somebody is recognition, and I think that that is part of leadership as well.
Speaker 2:Yeah, very true, and I think I'm going to have to spend some time thinking about that idea of the presentation of things being a way of showing love, because I'm personally not super into aesthetic things. So I've never really thought about it like that before. So I think I'm going to go and think about that a little bit more. So thank you for that little nugget there. But I'm wondering have you had the experience of someone really switched off and disengaged, like whether it's a staff member or a parent or a child, and how do you reach through to them? How do you get past those big barriers and still show them that they're recognized and appreciated and loved?
Speaker 4:I would love to meet the person that hasn't had a challenge. I always feel like if you're not making somebody upset or disappointed, you're not pushing hard enough, right, and you have to be relentless in your leadership to make sure that you're unapologetic about what kids deserve and what we want for our kids. So along the way, there's definitely been people that haven't been thrilled with me, regardless of how much kindness and love I've shared their way. I've learned in those situations to be very vulnerable, to allow myself to listen and to learn and understand where they're coming from. My default setting is that we have to assume best intentions of people and, at the end of the day, regardless of how it shows up, parents are advocating strongly for their children. You can't ask for more than that, right? They love their child that much that they're going to be emotionally invested Staff members. They are proud of their work and they want to do well, and so anything that looks like they're not doing well, they're going to be emotional about it. And for kids, especially middle school students, which is where I've spent my entire career we know the dynamics of the 11 to 14 year old brain. Their emotions are at the forefront, so they're going to be heightened. They're going to be reactionary, they're going to question things that are going to, you know, push back on things. That doesn't make them feel good in the moment, and so part of our job as leaders, I think is is to really try to seek to understand and then allow them to experience the feelings that they're feeling. Listen, give them space to do it.
Speaker 4:I used to tell my parents uh, my, my school parents all the time, not my real mom and dad, but, um, my school parents. You know, come into my office and be whoever you need to be in this moment, and it's a safe space to do it. So I'm going to protect my staff, I'm going to protect my other kids. Please don't be emotional or aggressive to them. I just leave that with me. Do all you need to do, because I think it's an honor for you to be that comfortable with me, to be able to share your deep, deep feelings, and so giving them the space to be able to do that, I think, is really, really, really important, regardless of who it is kid, adult, staff member but, at the same time, when you could be vulnerable in your leadership and say I don't understand your perspective because I've never lived in your space, in your time, in your context, but this is what, maybe a connecting experience I've had, so I'm understanding it like making that connection to people, allowing people to see that you're a human too and share with people. How you're making me feel, you know, like this is what I want. This is where I think we could come together. We both want the same things for your child, for our school, for your professional growth. If you're talking to a staff member, but this is what I'm feeling from your emotion and I think also, just, you know, keeping the main thing, the main thing and whatever it is, at the end of the day, that people need to get to that that's what you keep bringing the conversation back to. Like. This might not be your style, my approaches is might be different, we're thinking a little bit differently, but at the end of the day, what are ways that we could work together to be able to get to that same result, which is obviously and most important kids' safety and kids' well-being. And so, just you know being vulnerable.
Speaker 4:There was times when we, you know, we've had a turbulent ride in my school leadership.
Speaker 4:I led through COVID. Like so many other of my colleagues, I led through COVID, like so many other of my colleagues, but also, you know, we were a school, like I said, we weren't performing as best as we could on behalf of our children, so we needed to do a lot of hard work, and there would be days when I would stand up in front of my staff and say I don't know what to do here. But I know that we know what to do here, and so we're going to have to come together and figure out what it's going to look like, because one thing we're not going to do is give up. And so, yeah, I think you could be simultaneously soft and strong, and that requires you to be vulnerable. In those spaces where you might not know all the answers, you could still be strong and know that you're not going to give up. But in the same moment, you also have to say we need one another to be able to move forward, problem solve together and move forward.
Speaker 3:That's such a powerful thing to embody, I think, and see in action, is that vulnerability and softness, but knowing like we're still doing this together, like regardless of the circumstances, we have to figure this out. Knowing like we're still doing this together, like regardless of the circumstances, we have to figure this out. And so how did you then, because you pour your whole self into this how do you protect yourself in such emotional emotionality, because it's very draining? You had an open door to parents, and so how do you? How did you and how do you maneuver, like protecting your own emotions and your and your sanity in some cases? Right, because that's a lot to take on from other people.
Speaker 4:Yeah, I think I'm still. I'm still a work in progress in this tan. There's part of me where I feel like I'm strong all the time and I got this, but then there's moments where you're you have to, you question yourself and you say you know, am I doing the right thing in the right moment? And for me, I lean on two things my core values and my faith. And so my core values you know, once we've probably all done, you know, like the leadership I can't really remember the name of it right now Gallup, yeah, gallup. And StrengthsFinder and yep, one of my core my first core value is belief, and it really talks about how belief if that is your first core value, you don't stray from what you believe to be rights and what your mission is. And because of that, honestly, I think that's how I've been able to stay strong in crisis and in times that are rough. I know that I have this enormous responsibility of taking care of all these people and so I need to be my best self in this moment in time. And it's because I believe what I'm doing is right and we're taking care of kids, which is ultimately the top priority On my last day as principal of Magnolia Tammy.
Speaker 4:I know you know this story, christine, I know you might not. There was a shooting at our feeder high school and one of my former students, warren Grant, unfortunately lost his life that day, on my very last day of school leadership, on my very last day of school leadership. And the school is led by an amazing principal, one of my close friends. And so the emotions that I had to carry that day, not really knowing what's going on at that point in time, having to lead my school in a lockdown with students and staff that are extremely connected to the community and to all of our former students at Joppatown High School. Then also, you know, worrying for myself selfishly. The kids love dearly, my staff members there that I love dearly. Are they okay? What's going on? And then also just the field dearly. Are they okay? What's going on? And then also just the field, the moving parts of. Are we on lockdown? What do we need to do? What steps do we need to take? Is my building safe? Are my parents feeling that this thing is safe? Are parents going to come run up all the different dynamics?
Speaker 4:And that day, you know, I think about it often because of how many things we had to manage in the moment and how many decisions we had to make on the fly, and that was we did a shooting in our school, but how impactful it was in that moment in time. So I can't even imagine what Melissa was experiencing the worst, the worst nightmare that you could, you could imagine, as a principal for sure, you know. That day, about a half hour into our lockdown, nearly a dozen high schoolers showed up on our front steps, again, far walk from the high school, but they came to us, they came to their middle school, and so we wheeled out a cart of water and I sat on the curb with them because I really felt you know what else do you do in that moment? And you process, and we still weren't sure what was happening officially.
Speaker 4:That day, I think, reminded me that our purpose, no matter how many, what stakes, what the state assessments ask of us, what anyone expects out of public school, the first and only thing is taking care of children. And so, even as a director of middle school now, what I tell my principals all the time, you know, the only decision that we should ever be asking ourselves, regardless of the dynamics of the day or the emergency at hand is what is the best thing for the kids in the moment, and that seems so cliche, but it's moments of tragedy and chaos that remind us that always has to be the only decision that we make each day yeah that's so powerful.
Speaker 3:But yes to go back.
Speaker 4:I know that was kind of like a full circle, but it's being reminded of your purpose is how I kept myself grounded. Reminded of your purpose is is how I kept myself grounded. Um, knowing that this is I need to continue to work hard every single day to make sure that kids are okay. Um, figuratively, emotionally, physically, all of the things, um, and so, just reminding you know yourself with purpose and then also, you know, just allowing yourself to take a moment to breathe and taking a minute just to come back and go to the core. But it takes some structure to that. I always felt better when I had routines and procedures and practices in place and when I'm thrown off my routine, like when there was days where I wasn't able to be at the front door for whatever reason, or I wasn't able to make it to the classroom, that's when I felt like I was off. So, getting back to the basics, getting back to the routines, taking a minute, always grounded ourselves in what's important.
Speaker 3:Everything else is kind of falls in a line when those things are in place. It's funny that you mentioned that, because we need to wrap up the show here and we always ask our guests for a pare down pointer and maybe that's it right. Like you got routines, things will fall into place. Is there anything else you want to add to that or or bring up as a paradigm pointer for our listeners?
Speaker 4:Yeah, I think it's. It's a couple of things I mentioned that people by day, paperwork by night yeah, it's going to require you to work harder. You know it's going to be. There's no substitute for hard work or and being relentless and getting to success. And so hard work, routines, practices and prioritizing people yeah, those are the big things.
Speaker 3:Yeah, thank you so much for for chatting with us today, laurie, and sharing the story, too, about the events at your school on your last day. I think that's really impactful and helps us remember. You know, we really want the same thing for kids and that's to be safe and well, and so thank you for sharing that with us and chatting with us today.
Speaker 2:Thank you both very much us and chatting with us today. Thank you both very much. Today's episode was brought to you by Plan Z Professional Learning Services forward-thinking educator support.
Speaker 1:Find out more at planzplservicescom. Be sure to join Tammy and Christine and guests for more episodes of the Minimalist Educator Podcast. They would love to hear about your journey with minimalism. Connect with them at PlanZPLS on Twitter or Instagram. The music for the podcast has been written and performed by Gaia Moretti. Thank you.
