The Minimalist Educator Podcast

Episode 043: Transforming Leadership Through Self-Care and Intentionality with Mihoko Chida

Tammy Musiowsky-Borneman

Ready to transform your approach to educational leadership? Join us on the Minimalist Educator Podcast, where we welcome Mihoko Chida, a seasoned educational leader with over two decades of experience in Tokyo and Bangkok. Mihoko opens up about her journey, the relentless pressures of the role, and the critical decision to take a career break for her own well-being. Her candid discussion on the impacts of COVID-19 and the concept of being a "functional burnt-out leader" serves as a vital lesson for all passionate educators: self-care and intentional choices are non-negotiable.

Balancing professional responsibilities with personal well-being isn't just a solo endeavor. In our second chapter, we explore the taxing demands faced by school leaders and teachers, highlighting the necessity of setting boundaries and cultivating hobbies outside of work. We discuss the importance of systemic support in fostering teacher well-being, offering personal anecdotes and practical strategies to help educators achieve a healthy work-life balance. These insights are not just theoretical but actionable steps that can make a real difference in daily routines.

In the final segments, we delve into the importance of fostering positive team relationships and effective task management. Mihoko shares strategies like using filter questions to prioritize tasks, making them more meaningful and collaborative. As she embarks on new pathways in her professional journey, Mihoko reflects on the significance of continuous learning and growth. We extend our heartfelt thanks to her for sharing her story and remind our listeners to stay connected and share their own experiences with minimalism in education. Tune in for a thoughtful and necessary conversation on navigating stress, fostering well-being, and creating meaningful work in education.

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Speaker 1:

Welcome to the Minimalist Educator Podcast, a podcast about paring down to refocus on the purpose and priorities in our roles with co-hosts and co-authors of the Minimalist Teacher Book, Tammy Musiewski-Bornemann and Christine Arnold.

Speaker 2:

On today's episode, we speak with Mihoko Chida about issues to do with stress and burnout for those in leadership positions. Mihoko brings over 20 years of educational leadership experience, driven by a dedication to nurturing comprehensive student development across diverse settings. Her approach emphasizes collaboration, human-centeredness and reflective practice. Prior to her leadership role, she taught in California public schools. During her 13 years abroad, she served as elementary school principal at Nishimachi International School in Tokyo, Japan. Her most recent venture led her to Bangkok, Thailand, where she played a role in establishing Verso International School in August 2020. Following the school's launch, Mihoko led a team spanning early years to grade four, fostering a cohesive culture amid challenges, ensuring program coherence and promoting student retention. She holds a doctorate from East Carolina University focusing on creativity's implementation in international school contexts.

Speaker 2:

Recently, Mihoko decided to take a career break and return to the US to pursue personal and professional growth opportunities. And professional growth opportunities. Hi everyone, and welcome to today's episode of the Minimalist Educator Podcast. Tammy and I are here today with Mihoko Chida. How are you today, Mihoko? I am fantastic, Awesome. How are you, Tammy?

Speaker 3:

I'm great as well. I'm excited to be here with both of you to chat about what we're going to talk about today, because it's a super important topic, absolutely.

Speaker 2:

So, for our listeners, mihoko and I met when we were working together in Tokyo, and she and I were lucky enough to work together as coaches, which was really awesome.

Speaker 2:

And then Mihoko became our curriculum coordinator, and then she became our principal of the elementary school, and then she went off to Bangkok to set up a brand new school from scratch, from the ground up, and while she was doing all of that, she also worked on her ed doctorate, and she has always been one of these people that I've looked to as, just like you know, an unstoppable force and so passionate about education. And then, all of a sudden, we get this message saying I need a break, I'm going to stop, I'm going to go home, like I need a minute, and so I was really excited that Mihoko agreed to join us today to talk about this whole experience and what it's been like and what brought her to that moment of needing a break, and in the hopes that we can send a message on to the rest of us passionate educators. So do you want to talk to us a little bit about what brought you to that moment, mihako?

Speaker 4:

Well, I mean, thank you for the nice introduction. Even listening to it, I'm like, oh yeah, I can't believe that happened and that happened. And then I realized, oh, that's why I needed a break. Even in that short intro, I could hear that all the things that you know and I think as educators, we tend to go, go, go, and I think everybody would have an intro like that, anybody you talk to and I decided, well, I was inspired by mainly some like part of it with you, christine, because I know you've taken time off, and everybody we worked with in Tokyo had at one point taken time off in their careers, and I realized I have never I've always walked the line, like I've always done the high school thing, straight to college, you know, straight to grad school got my master's started working, you know, and I did everything the way it's usually written down on paper, and so it was really kind of a scary but exciting sort of idea or concept to take time off and like veer off the planned road, and the difference, though, is that it wasn't like something happened, it was just like I made the decision to veer off the plan road.

Speaker 4:

I think there are lots of people who you know, certain obstacles or life events happen and they take a little tangential path. But I decided that if I continued on that this road, I would keep going and that if I didn't create the new path for myself, um, that I would just keep going and kind of run myself to the ground. So I don't love to use the word burnout because I I've been trying to like find a better word for it, but I was a functional burnt out leader in a school is the best way I could probably describe it.

Speaker 3:

I think that's so relatable for so many leaders in schools as well is that they just keep going, that you're running on fumes and you're like I can do it, we just have to make it to the end of the year and then I'll have a little bit of downtime in the summer and you think that's enough and okay. But as a school leader like you don't really get like what do you get maybe a week or two off? Like you don't get the same downtime that teachers get right.

Speaker 4:

Right, and I think I mean and I mean you have to name the elephant in the room which is COVID opening a school during COVID times and everyone needed a lot of mental care, you know, and kids and colleagues and the teachers that I was working with, and I really felt like you know, how are you? No, really, how are you Tell me what's going on? We were in remote learning, schedule calls with people, like checking in with people, and it got to a point where I started to feel I had a moment of like. No one's asked me you know how I was doing, and before that like led to resentment about how come no one's asking me? You know I'm giving, giving, giving and no one's you know giving to me. I I just was like I have to take a break and I think you're right, tammy, it is something that is happening to a lot of people. I think teachers, educators, we're kind of, we're self-sacrificing as it is. You know, when you're the adult in the room and you have 20, 30 other kids, you put your needs, you know, aside for the moment, and that's what makes good educators good educators. You know, how many times have you heard you know? Oh, I was going to sit down for lunch, but then so-and-so and so-and-so got into you know something at playground and you jump in and I commend that and that's definitely something that is a part of our jobs.

Speaker 4:

But it got to the point where I was starting to like question my intuition. I'd oh, I've never been the smartest person in the room, the most knowledgeable person in the room. I've always just gone through in like intuition and I just couldn't trust it. I was second guessing myself all the time and I think and I, you know, and I did I was doing all the things that we talk about with like mental health, like self-care. You know, I had it on my list every day.

Speaker 4:

Um, you know, take a breather. You know, once a week I got a massage and I lived in Thailand, so it was really easy to do that. But, um, and it was more than once a week, I'll admit but but I found myself like it became a chore. You know, it wasn't a habit, it wasn't sort of, it was something else on my to-do list, the self-care things, and I think that it was. It was sort of I was like I can't, I have to take a little bit of a breather, I have to take a little bit of a breather and to even question whether or not I want to be back on a school site or if there's other things that I want to do in the realm of education, or even. You know, I kept joking about this. I was like I want to get like a mindless job. I want to work at Target or Trader Joe's and just stock shelves. Um, and I I mean, don't rule it out, I might still do it, but uh, I just don't, I just needed.

Speaker 2:

I was no good to people in where I was. Well, I mean, I would have to disagree with you not being the smartest person in the room, mihoke, I would disagree with that, but that's my perspective, my perspective.

Speaker 4:

I knew you were going to say that I could predict it.

Speaker 2:

But you know you mentioned a couple of things there that were adding on to your plate COVID and the isolation of being in leadership. But for yourself, and maybe for other people around you that you've spoken to, what are some other stressful things in our leadership positions that are really adding a lot to everyone's workload and bandwidth and so on?

Speaker 4:

Yeah, I think, as a leader, anytime somebody approaches you it's for something you know, I mean, and it's not all transactional, I don't mean that all I had great relationships and there are lots of people who cared about me as a human, me as a leader, you know, and everything about me. But if we're teachers are busy and if they're looking for you in the middle of the day, it's because they need something, whether it's the sign off on a receipt or you know that's a quick one. But if it's like, oh, we're having a situation with the parent or and it's it does, it does start to get taxing if you're not tending to your needs yourself. There's nothing wrong with the teacher approaching a principal or leader for support or for a question. There's nothing wrong with that. And I don't mean to encourage people not to do that.

Speaker 4:

Um, and even people who are like sorry to bother you, you know, and they come and ask a question, I always say like don't, you don't need to apologize, that's what I'm here for, you know. But, um, it does. It just was like. I was like, okay, the minute I leave my office and see someone, it's going to be something they need, I need, or any email that comes my way, any message that comes my way, is a is a task or a problem or a struggle that someone else is having, and I think that's the day-to-day nature of being a leader. That's our role to serve and to support. So I don't I think that's part of being a leader. It's part of being a teacher. I mean, you think about how many times kids ask you like they have questions, but I think it, and so, as leaders, we have to be even more diligent about tending to ourselves and boundaries.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, you had mentioned before too, about before you had resentment, right, because people weren't checking in with you in such a highly stressful time. That's such a that's such an important nugget to think about, Right, because I think we do get to that point even in our personal lives. It's like, before I resent this person or what's the situation or whatever I need to like address what's happening, and for you you are able to take the time and like really you know detach. For some leaders they don't have that option, right. So, like you'd said, I'd scheduled in my self-care and then it became a chore. Do you have any like just like mental strategies or thoughts that you would have that might help some administrators or teachers just kind of work through that? Like I'm not at the point yet where I can actually like take actual time off and but I I need a break, I need to do something.

Speaker 4:

Right and I realized I am super lucky to take this time off. You know, I worked in overseas in a country that was low income, like low, like cost of living, so I was able to save a lot of money. I, for it, I'm single. I don't have um people depending on my salary. I have parents who are willing to let me live with them in a nice place in California, um, so the weather is nice. You know, I'm really lucky and and so I and I I do.

Speaker 4:

I think about this all the time where I'm like, okay, how could I have? Why did I need this drastic measure? Cause not everybody could do that. And I don't think sometimes, when I'm in my most self-doubting moments, where I'm thinking, okay, I don't think I could ever work again, cause I'm scared that I'll fall into the same patterns, what I realized is that I don't have hobbies, or or I don't have hobbies or I don't have many hobbies or interests outside of work, you know, I think. And so during this time off I've been joking, I've been taking ceramics classes.

Speaker 4:

I tried tennis. Tennis was not for me, ceramics I'm not great at, because apparently, to be good at ceramics you're supposed to like, not think. You're supposed to be intuitive. You're supposed to be intuitive and I tend to approach tasks in a more sort of step-by-step, you know way.

Speaker 4:

But I look at people who you know, lots of international teachers. They move around and one of the first things they do when they move to a new place is like oh, I love soccer, I'm going to join a soccer team or I'm going to, you know, find my, join my local church or things like that. I don't have any of that. A lot of my hobbies are kind of escapes from reality. I love my trashy reality television and my K-pop, but it's nothing that brings me around other people or brings me an opportunity to explore different parts of my brain.

Speaker 4:

And I think that's what I would recommend and I recommend to everybody is that you know the more hobbies or life you have outside of, and that's people with families. I'm always like I don't know how people go home and like not, you know, handle having a family at home. And then I realized somebody had said to me well, actually I can't think about work the minute I go, go home. I'm a mom and so she's like I'm, I'm forced to switch brains, whereas I can go home and fester about some challenging meeting that I had and how I could have done things differently or what I could do next.

Speaker 2:

And you fall into that trap. Yeah, I think that happens to a lot of us, especially when we move overseas for a job, that our whole world gets wrapped up in that job for sure, I can definitely see that in my own experiences as well. We've spoken before in previous conversations about how a lot of this you know teacher wellbeing, narrative centres around the teacher themselves taking action. They need to be responsible for making sure they're okay, and we've discussed how it really needs to be structures and systems that support this. Can you tell us a little bit about your thinking around that?

Speaker 4:

Yeah, I was lucky in when I was, when I went to go open Berso in Bangkok. I was. I was lucky in the sense that I got a chance to really re-evaluate the systems that are already in schools, because we have these conversations of okay, traditionally schools do it like a timetable this way. Do we want to continue doing that, or do we want to be innovative and do something different that we know is better for learning, better for kids' well-being? And so I started thinking a lot about systems and the structures in place that sort of bind us to the way we operate, and I realized that a lot of the stress comes from things that are already in place, that we can't control. They're out of our sphere of influence.

Speaker 4:

So I went to a conference and it was a leadership conference, and this is after I'd started taking my time off, and so I'm kind of already examining burnout and why burnout happens, and the keynote speakers asked everybody to pick up, like turn their phones off. They said and he's like okay, this could be the first time in a long time that you are able to have a conversation with a person with no interruptions. And I think prior to that my time off I would have been like, okay, you're right, it's my job to put the boundary down and like turn my phone off, don't look at my emails. But I started thinking you have a room full of heads of schools, principals, you know, directors. Why are they getting emails all times of the day, when people at work know they're at a conference and that they are, you know, doing something that's good for their professional development? And I started to think about okay, why are they getting their emails? Why, you know? And I thought, okay, well, they might be getting emails about student behavior.

Speaker 4:

Well, why isn't there enough, you know, mental health support on campus? Why don't we have enough counselors, or you know? Then I started thinking about oh, they're getting a parent, a parent complaint in an email. Okay, so why don't we have better relationships with parents? You know why? And I started thinking about, like it's not the a leader or a teacher's fault that they're feeling stressed or burnt out. It's. There's a lot of other pressures that we don't have control over, and I think so much of like self-care or kind, be kind to yourself. It's yeah, I try my best to be kind to myself, but maybe, perhaps the world needs to be kind to people who are trying to be kind to themselves.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, yeah, and I don't think there is that type of structure in place, right Well?

Speaker 4:

I was just thinking. Even teachers, you can't respond to emails or texts really during the day, so you wait till the kids go home, which means that you also now have to prepare for learning the next day and respond to all the emails you missed during the day, all the emails you missed during the day after. You know, towards the end of the day, and contract hours are usually, you know, half an hour, an hour after kids leave and you usually have meetings. So that means it's inherently designed for teachers who are with kids to have to go home and respond to emails on their break time or you know, and find other times to do that. And so I started thinking well, why? There's lots of reasons for that, right, and I think that it's a teacher in a classroom can't control that, and sometimes he or she will put that burden on themselves and think why can't I? Why am I feeling so stressed out? And I feel like more teachers and educators, leaders need to hear that part of it is the way jobs and schools are designed.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 4:

Controversial perhaps.

Speaker 3:

Right. Did you have success then, when you were designing your school, with having a different type of schedule and like things built in for teachers?

Speaker 4:

We tried. And the irony is, when you have a blank slate and you're allowed to be free and innovative, you actually a lot of times resort back to old habits, mainly because, at the end of the day, there's other factors that we can't control, like accreditation Thailand. We needed to be accredited by the Ministry of Education as well, and they're very strict their timetables. They have strict guidelines for timetables. We were able to play, which was exciting, which I hadn't experienced before, and we were able to implement some things that we definitely wanted to keep. It's interesting, I would have.

Speaker 4:

And now, with technology, you know you wake up and you check your email, you check your seesaw, you check your messages, you check your line, you check your WhatsApp, you know you've got messages coming in from all different areas, and we had talked about streamlining communication and even norms so that there's certain times that we respond to parents, and some teachers had a really hard time with that. They were like I can't ignore a parent is messaging me, and I was. I was like you're not ignoring it, you're putting a pause on it. It's really hard to really shift that. We're just ingrained to think we respond right away or when we can, and sometimes you have to take a pause on that as well.

Speaker 3:

I like this idea I'm just thinking about because we've talked to a couple of people about communications and that's something that Christine and I are digging into a little bit more with some new writing, and, I think, because I'm one of those people who likes the response, even if it's not the answer that I need right now, but just acknowledge that you've gotten the email, and I think that's one of the great things about automating things right. So for parents like probably teachers could automate an email that goes out to parents that says your email is in my inbox, I will respond to you within however time, much time and then you know, then they see, okay, it's there, and then you don't get the string of emails Like it's been two hours and you haven't responded, so I'm going to text. You know that kind of people get a little bit like, oh, they're not getting back to me, but sometimes automating things just makes things so much easier.

Speaker 4:

Yeah, like seesaw, the best feature is you can see if they've seen the message. You know they read it and just that it's like, okay, they read it. They're going to get back to me when they have time and I think part of the sometimes when parents there's deeper, I think there's like time to it's, it's important to examine the deeper feelings that are beneath that, the anxiety of, oh, they email and they check and they check again and they check again because they're unsure or there's some sort of distrust or even uncertainty or confusion. And I think that the stronger that relationship is, the more likely that parent's going to go. Okay, I emailed her but she hasn't gone back to me. I did see her pick up but she's probably going to respond, you know, after she gets back to her office.

Speaker 4:

I think it's there are there's some benefit of the doubt that can be provided when there's better relationships that are bridging the people together, and I think that that's what I was I focused on in my school in Bangkok where I was like, let's focus on, at least with you know, our team, that we're going to cut each other some slack. You know, if someone forgets something or doesn't isn't right on it, we're going to be a little kind to each other, because that's adding on to not only their stress, but it's your stress too, you know, and then you're going why didn't they do this and why didn't? It's just a kind of breeds negativity all around.

Speaker 2:

For sure, giving each other a little bit of a little bit of leeway is is very helpful, and not jumping to conclusions about people's motivations or their mindset or the state that they're in at that particular time for sure. Unfortunately, we are starting to run out of time here, mihoko, so we might have to start wrapping up, but we do like to ask our guests for a pare down pointer. If you've got one, just some quick little tidbit that you can share with our listeners, I'm prepared for this one.

Speaker 4:

So I know so many people who have to-do lists. Right, we all have to do this. I'm a big planner person. I am, you know, and but my tip would be for the to-do list. So I would sit down every Sunday, write down all the things that you know. I think that needed to be done that week, knowing that it would double by the time I got to work on Monday, but but it was one of the things.

Speaker 4:

My trick is to sort of have filter questions around your to do list. So once you've created your to do list, look at look at it and say, okay, what are things I can outsource to other people? You know, like that's, there's a reason why I have someone do my taxes and give me financial advice advice because I've outsourced that task to a professional, and so there's lots of ways to do that, you know. And then the second question I'd always ask and this is better for your teams is you know, do I have to be the person? Do I grow? Is it best if I grow, if I do the task? So you know, we talk about in our classrooms like whoever's doing it is learning it, and you know if, if a teacher comes to me and says, oh, I'm looking to find some more articles about, you know, reading fluency in early years. And I'll say, oh, I have a few articles I'll like, you know, definitely, look, I'll send them to you later. And it doesn't take me long to dig through my article bank and send it to them.

Speaker 4:

But I realized, okay, that's not really not just, not only is that a task for me, but that could be meaning, more meaningful, if I say respond with like, oh, you know, what I know so-and-so is really great, really interested in that, and why don't you talk to them? I'm happy to cover your next duty and maybe you guys can chat, because I know you guys don't get a chance to chat very often because you've got different schedules, and then they can start a conversation and then they can start to research and learn more. So it's like two birds with one stone. Not only is it, it's not a task that I have to do, but it's an opportunity for something better to happen, where it's not just a task that I just check do, but it's an opportunity for something better to happen, where it's not just a task that I just check off my list, but it's got more meaningful purpose behind it and it does add to my list too, because then I follow up and I have to.

Speaker 4:

You know I go oh, how was that conversation? Was that enough information? Is there something you want to do with this information? So it's not doesn't completely eliminate things off of my to-do list, but I would. I would encourage everybody to look at their to-do lists with a few filter questions. Another one of my filter questions I always do is what impacts learning the most? What impacts kids? Those are usually the things that get done first. So I think if you have a list of questions and you've filtered your to-do list, it does help you plan better and be more meaningful with your work. That's a great idea.

Speaker 2:

I love that. Well, Mihiko, I'm really excited to see where your new pathway takes you, and maybe we can get you back on the podcast and hear more about your journey.

Speaker 4:

Time is something I have a lot of.

Speaker 2:

Anytime. Okay, awesome, thank you so much and, yeah, we really appreciate you joining us today. Today's episode was brought to you by Plan Z Professional Learning Services forward-thinking educator support. Find out more at planzplservicescom.

Speaker 1:

Be sure to join Tammy and Christine and guests for more episodes of the Minimalist Educator Podcast. They would love to hear about your journey with minimalism. Connect with them at planzpls on Twitter or Instagram. The music for the podcast has been written and performed by Gaia Moretti you.

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